T-Man's Games

The Figure in the Shadows is OK, but I think I'm too old for this...

noreply@blogger.com (T-Man) — Thu, 04 Dec 2008 00:51:00 +0000

A little while after summertime, my parents went to a bookstore. It was there that they found John Bellairs' books. Now, I've been looking for a good scare, certainly, but it was only since this Halloween that my parents let me start watching scary movies. For most of this semester of school so far, I was caught up in Halo: The Fall of Reach (I still haven't posted my review for that). I resolved that, when I finished that book, I would get started on one of my John Bellairs. Unfortunately, that wasn't such a good idea after watching The Ring and The Grudge (two of the scariest movies ever created by man, I might add). If I were two years younger, I would have probably enjoyed it more (I doubt I would have been scared, to tell the truth), but now that I've seen what TRUE horror is…well, let's just say I'm unimpressed…and that's a problem, considering that I have a crapload of them. Maybe my sister will read them...

The one that I chose to read was The Figure in the Shadows. This kiddie tale stars Lewis Barnavelt, an 11-year-old boy living with his magician uncle in the 1950's. His best friend is Rose Rita, a much tougher young girl that he envies. There's also another important character, Lewis's next door neighbor, Mrs. Zimmermman, who practices magic like his uncle.

While not scary *at all*, The Figure in the Shadows has an admittedly interesting plot. It revolves around a magical three-cent piece from the 1800's that is SUPPOSED to bring good luck to Lewis. While it does help him beat up the school bully, Woody Mingo, he starts receiving weird letters that say, in Latin, "I come," and this weird shadowy figure (literally, a figure in the shadows) starts stalking Lewis. While the plot is interesting, the plot DEVELOPMENT really isn't very good. No action happens until the last few chapters. The plot isn't resolved until the last few pages, rather than the mystery gradually being solved…which would have been much cooler.

Of course, this is coming from a person who is not only literally a month and 25 days away from being a teenager, but has watched some of the scariest movies ever made. If you're in the 8-10 range and have never seen a scary movie (at that age, I doubt you'll have), then I certainly recommend this book to you. I don't really think you'll be scared, but you'll like it.

The Figure in the Shadows gets a 3 out of 5.

The REAL Halo Experience!

noreply@blogger.com (T-Man) — Sat, 01 Nov 2008 22:59:00 +0000

Friends, citizens…whatever that other word was, I am pleased to announce that I, T-Man, have found the full experience of Halo!

What do I mean, you ask? Why, I've beaten both Halo: CE and Halo 3 by myself, of course! (I skipped Halo 2) Previously, I had cut through all three games with my cousin on co-op. Unfortunately, the co-op experience isn't as good as the single player experience. Fortunately, for the past two weeks, I've been working on Halo 1 and 3 again, and completed both campaigns by myself. My opinions have changed for both games; Halo 3 only slightly, but Halo 1 drastically.

For school, I've been reading Halo: Fall of Reach (Eric Nyland), and it's gradually been giving me a profound craving to play the games. So, one day, I got done with school (I'm home schooled), and played Halo. After going through the game on single player, I've finally realized how truly great the game is.

For starters: Holy Crap. Those two words, which I've never said for any other game at all. Holy Crap. The Halo games are the only games that deserve such a strong proclamation. One of the best things about Halo: CE is that it doesn't start out as slow as the other two games (Halo 2 and 3 don't necessarily start out "slowly," they just don't start out as excitingly as Halo 1). It puts you right in the fray. Almost immediately, you'll be showering Elites with pain or flipping Grunts over with headshots. Once that's done, you'll be looking for survivors of the crash on Halo, which seems much easier to me now.

In the next stage, you get a sniper rifle. The mother of all awesome weapons. You'll be picking off Grunts and Jackals from hiding, and it's so much fun. But by the time you're beamed aboard the Covenant ship in that stage, it'll probably be out of ammo.

To tell the truth, things don't really get hard until "Assault On The Control Room." THAT'S when things start getting REALLY tough, as hard as Heroic is on Halo 3 (I've started the campaign over on Heroic, and I'm not doing too well). Expect to die a lot from that point on, cause the stage you enter after that…serves as the introduction for the well-named Flood.

Too bad I've just spoiled a surprise for those of you who haven't played the game yet. I wasn't really that surprised, since I knew about the Flood before I even started playing Halo, and yet I could still admit that they are introduced in about the coolest way ever. It all starts with the Jenkins cutscene, during which Master Chief goes through the log of a marine he finds dead in a Covenant base. He fast forwards through his log, and at the end, he sees Flood feasting on people. Immediately after the cutscene ends, Flood start…flooding the room. The tiny ones aren't that hard…but soon the big ones start busting through the wall. Ominous, yet fast-paced and fitting music, starts playing as you try to destroy this new threat before it destroys you. From this point on, you'll learn to love the shotgun; melee doesn't do anything to the Flood, so you need a lot of firepower. After that stage, I faced a terribly degrading embarrassment: I had to play through the next stage on Easy. Thankfully, that was the only time I had to do that.

I've come to realize that Halo: CE isn't stupid hard…just hard. You'll be having a tough time throughout the final levels. Personally, I think that the Flood added an interesting new dimension for a game that wasn't even getting old in the first place. But don't think that the Covenant are gone just yet. They're back, too…and harder than ever. When it comes to Wraiths (their equivalent of a Scorpion), be afraid, be very afraid. Also, take note that you CANNOT ride them in this game, so don't go killing yourself trying to get in one.

Although CE is great, Halo 3 is better in every respect. Although the campaign is considerably shorter, co-op is better than ever. One of the reasons is that the story makes more sense with it; rather than playing with a clone of that stage's particular character, you play as the Arbiter if you're player 2. I've heard that that two other people can play, and they'll play as Elites. There is very little lag, and you can play co-op online now. Also, generally, vehicle interface has improved. Wraiths and Scorpions now have turrets for your friends to man. I know it was the case in Halo 2, as well, but most vehicles can boost. Did I mention that the Mongoose was super cool?

Then there's the multiplayer. Yeah, that's right. I've taken Halo online, and it. is. awesome. No more needs to be said.

So, there you have it. A second opinion on Halo 1 and Halo 3. Now, I would rate both of them a 5 out of 5. They're just so…awesome.

Give An Elebit...

noreply@blogger.com (T-Man) — Sat, 25 Oct 2008 18:51:00 +0000

--------An Overview of My Rating System---------

Remember when I used an unwieldy Word system for rating games? Starting with my review for Halo: Combat Evolved (see July, 2008 archives), I switched to a 5-place rating system. However, my rating system is mostly affected by personal preference. So, let's say I thought a game was very good, but fell short of a 4 out of 5 (such as this game), in which case I would give a game a 3 out of 5. That doesn't mean I didn't like the game that much. I think that the easiest way to explain my rating system is to compare each rating to ratings in a standard 10-point rating system.

5 out of 5 (10 out of 10): The cream of the crop! It doesn't necessarily have to be perfect, or revolutionary, or whatever, but it's a really great game that I definitely recommend.

4 out of 5 (8 or 9 out of 10): A really great game. A few flaws here and there, or maybe it's just not "fun enough" to earn a 5, but still recommended, especially if you like its genre.

3 out of 5 (6 or 7 out of 10): A good game that will either have some flaws that detract from the experience or just not be really fun. I would recommend this to you if you're a fan of its particular genre, don't think you'll mind the game's flaws (considering that I'll inform you about the game's flaws in the review), or find it in the 10-20 dollar range.

2 out of 5 (3, 4 or 5 out of 10): An OK game with its fair share of major flaws that can seriously detract from the experience. In the rarest of cases, I could possibly be in a bad mood and give an otherwise fun game a 2 for major flaws. That's not happened yet, however. Also, remember that my reviews are mostly based upon personal preference. 2 out of 5 can be like 3 out of 10 when it's a game that I didn't like, but didn't think was necessarily terrible. I don't recommend games given this rating for full price, but if you ever find it for 10 bucks or less, it's a fair purchase.

1 out of 5 (1 or 2 out of 10): I've never given a game a rating this low and probably never will, considering I only get games I want. However, it's in my rating system, so I'll make it short and sweet:

Don't waste your money on this crap!!

A 1 out of 5 can be likened to 2 out of 10 if it had SOME redeeming qualities, but was otherwise crap.

0 out of 5 (0 out of 10): I simply hope that I never have to give a game this rating. Games rated 0 have no redeeming qualities, and are simply worthless pieces of junk. If I ever rate a game 0, that means that they should find the landfill where they buried the E.T. cartridges, and pour a truckload of this game over it like whipped cream. I think the recommendation here rather speaks for itself. You want advice? If you see someone about to buy it at GameStop, swat it out of their hand and give a good, nice finger-wag.

Although my rating system is mostly based on how fun I thought the game was rather than how "flawed" it was, the amount of flaws in the game may effect the final evaluation. Also, I never let the fact that a sequel is similar to its predecessor count towards or against a rating (unless, of course, its predecessor was crap).

Okay, so, now that that's over, enjoy the review.

--------------------------------------------------------------

A few months ago, I got a Wii game called Elebits…and I'm finally reviewing it. Yayyyyyyyy…whatever. So, why didn't I review it a long time ago? Well, my friends, anyone who's played the game will know that the second-to-last level is extremely maddening. I lost on it several times, and…I didn't play the game for months. But a little while ago, I decided to get back into it, and I beat it! Yay for me!!!

To tell you all the truth, Elebits isn't a game that I would normally buy. Games like Elebits, Raving Rabbids, Katamari Damaci…that kind of stuff that at first glance seems like crap but turns out to be wildly popular. I may have seen the trailer (it's in the game, and may have looked a little familiar), and that didn't make me think any different. Then, I saw the game on Cheat!, thought it looked interesting, and the next thing I knew, my cheap wooden swingset came crashing down with me on it and my middle finger (go figure) ended up in a pompous splint. I wasn't in agony, but my sister gets a toy whenever something's wrong with her, so shouldn't I get a game for my troubles? I wanted Wario Ware: Smooth Moves, but unfortunately, that, for whatever reason, was still 30 bucks at Wal-Mart (ALWAYS low prices?). So, instead, Elebits, which was ten dollars cheaper, was what I ended up with.

To start out with, I'll talk about the presentation. The title screen is fairly bland; just a white background with Elebits walking across the screen and the game's title. Upon selecting your file, things get a lot flashier, with the background of a town and an Elebit-shaped cursor to select things. Upon starting up story mode, you are greeted with a flash animation scene to start up the story (the story will mostly play out in flash scenes every now in then, although a stage-by-stage story is given with a memo you can access from the screen when you pick "Story Mode"). The animation is pretty nice…but then again, the voice acting is terrible. It's some of the most emotionless, fake voice acting you've ever heard. Yet, this game's story isn't really its selling point, so…

The game's graphics are fairly decent. The artstyle is great, comparable to games like Katamari. However, the environments are somewhat bland, with dull colors, and the framerate starts to fluctuate badly in the later levels, which are bigger and have more going on. You still didn't come for the graphics, though.

You came for the gameplay, didn't you? In the game, you move around objects, pick up stuff, and turn on appliances to collect Elebits, which allow electricity (and plumbing, evidently) to be used. You use a capture gun to do this; however, it doesn't blow their tiny heads off in the process of collecting the cute things, thankfully. There is a certain amount of watts worth of Elebits you need to collect to restore electricity to a certain area. Your gun has a preset level of power from the beginning of the stage, and can only lift objects within that weight range. To upgrade your gun's power, turn on appliances (which you can use once enough watts are collected) to get Power Elebits, which upgrade your gun's level if you collect enough. The Wii Remote controls your crosshair for your gun, and you press A to shoot an Elebit or object. While holding an object, use the Wii Remote to move it around. Elebits are often hiding under or in objects; sometimes breakable objects need to be broken to find Elebits, but be careful not to break too many objects in stages that limit it! Some stages also have a limit to how much noise you make, so be weary of that, too. The gameplay is fun, although the only downside to it is that you have to do certain things, such as open drawers, closets, and doors with the capture gun's beam that you could just as easily do by yourself. It normally wouldn't be a big deal, albeit stupid, but it's a downside because they'll often try close on you while you're about to enter the room/look in the closet or drawer, making it a nuisance. It would be much better if you could do that stuff with your hands.

There are several temporary upgrades strewn about the stages, such as the Homing and Vacuum lasers, which let you pick up several Elebits at once, as well as a shield to protect you from Elebit attacks (and, in several stages, even toy cannons and tanks), an Elebit radar, an Elebit cookie to attract Elebits…a lot of stuff.

One of the most fun things about the game is the sense of extreme power that you get as you level up your gun by collecting Power Elebits. When your gun gets to a high level, you can lift just about anything; cars, trucks, bulldozers…if you get enough Power Elebits before the stage ends, you can even lift whole buildings off their foundations! Unfortunately, most stages end before you can obtain this sort of power. The good part? You can edit stages, and set your gun's power level to as high as you want, but that's another story.

Throughout the first few levels, you'll mostly be in your home. They'll be relatively small and easy, and there won't be many hazards; all you do is walk around collecting Elebits and activating appliances to upgrade your gun. But later in the game, you'll notice that there ARE Elebit bosses, and they're pretty fun. The first one is harmless; just a big Elebit. The next bosses will actually pose a bit of a threat, not to mention hazards like small cannons and toy tanks manned by malicious, evil Elebits threatening to kill you at every turn in several levels. Well…they don't KILL you…they just try to break your gun so you can't capture them. Gray Elebits (they look more purple to me), and Big Yellow Elebits will also try to attack you, so beware. Also, throughout the game, the stages get bigger and harder. The last few stages, taking place in the amusement park, are the biggest and hardest in the game.

A neat feature of the game is the Edit Mode, which allows you to edit stages. When editing stages, you can place objects from other stages, Elebits, and items and change the whole layout of the stage. The problem is that objects have a cost to them, and the cost of the objects and Elebits you can have in a stage cannot exceed 1,000. Still, you can have some neat level designs. I, myself, have only created ONE good stage, and tried many, many times. I call it "Cleanup Time" (you don't actually get to name it). It has a 30-second time limit, and one vacuum laser, which you use to pick up 30,000 watts-worth of Elebits, and they're everywhere. It's okay, but it's really short.

So far, my review has been mostly rainbows and lollipops, talking about the good things about the game. Thing is, the game can actually be really frustrating. Now, you are entering the more critical part of the review….MUAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!

YAY!!! At the end of the game, you go to the amusement park! Or is it yay? No, my friends, it is not yay, for now, you shall be introduced to…Yellow Elebits. These things are extremely annoying. At first glance, it's just a normal, cute, tiny puffball. But if there are other Elebits nearby…you're in for it. It will start to glow and make wooshy noise, and then all the other Elebits will join with them to form the Big Yellow Elebit. They're so annoying to deal with, considering you have to knock them into floors and ceilings every which way before they separate. That's not the worst of it.

The worst of it is cannons and Gray Elebits. In the levels before the amusement park, cannons were there, but to a small degree. In those levels, though…cannons are everywhere, as well as mobile tanks. Plus, your gun has to be at least to level 2 to pick them up. This is a problem is stage 28. That stage…is so long…and so hard. Several times, Elebits or objects you NEED are thrown outside of the stage to where you can't get them. At the beginning of the stage, you are confined to a small area FILLED with cannons. Only when your gun levels up to 3 can you get out. Also, there is quite a large portion of the stage which is inaccessible, forcing you to zap/grab things while overlooking it…and there's a lot of stuff there to grab. There's also a very large "Circle Ride" there, which I never figured out how to operate (it's supposed to have some significance). When and IF you beat that stage, though, the final one isn't that bad. In fact, it's one of the best stages!

Still, there's the matter of the final boss. Even though the story isn't that important to the type of game Elebits is, I don't feel I should spoil WHY you're fighting it. I will only say that it's a fairly big Elebit. The premise of the first phase is simple: smack it silly with surrounding objects by using your capture gun, avoid its lunging attacks, and pick up the smaller Elebits it drops whenever you hit it.
Then, there's phase 2.

Now, me and my also-gaming dad both agree that something that can really kill a game is a stupid hard last boss. You can get to the end, having tons of fun…and then there's that ridiculous boss that makes you want to break the game in half.

In phase 2, the giant Elebit fuses with an amusement park robot that resembles a Transformers robot (namely, Optimus Prime). To defeat it, you must use your Capture Gun to unscrew the screws holding the body together. Doesn't sound too bad, right? WRONG!!!!

OK, to pull the robot's screws out, you have to hook onto it, and rapidly twist the Wii Remote left to unscrew it. Of course, it makes sense, considering you turn a screw left to unscrew it. Unfortunately, when you're right-handed, at least, rapidly moving a Wii Remote in a counterclockwise manner causes cramps. Quickly. These cramps will often cause you to turn the Wii Remote right by accident, thus screwing it back. Not to mention, it takes FOREVER to unscrew it, regardless of whether that happens, and there are several screws. Aaaaaand he moves around a lot, meaning you'll lose your grip quite a lot. Stage 29 was a brief reprieve from the hardship of stage 28, and the first phase was fairly simple, but then THIS…this fated boss fight… Just power through it, and once you're done, you never have to relive it again…

The Final Conclusion:

+ Decent graphics; great artstyle despite bland textures
+ Fun gamepay; certain flaws involving holding doors and drawers open with your Capture Gun, but other than that, it's fun
+ Stage editing feature is neat
+ Elebit bosses are fun
-- New types of Elebits introduced later in the game can cause trouble
-- Stage 28 is evil! EVIL!!!
-- The final boss is painful…quite literally, in fact

So, in the end, Elebits gets a 3 out of 5. Although it's not awesome, it's still a fun game, and I recommend it to you if you find it for 20 dollars or less. Stage 28 and the final boss really don't hurt the game enough to not buy it, but it never hurts to warn anybody about things like that.

SA2 Review

noreply@blogger.com (T-Man) — Sun, 05 Oct 2008 04:43:00 +0000

For lack of finding a better title, I simply said "SA2 Review" in order to have something there. I'm hoping that my readers don't immediately boycott my site.

For those of you who are still sticking around after seeing the dull title, I've finally decided to review one of my favorite games of all time: SONIC ADVENTURE 2!!!! Can't you hear the crowd cheering?

It is one of my favorite games because the original Sonic Adventure was the first game I ever played. It set me on a path to loving Sonic, resulting in extreme obsession from ages 3-5, and then reasonable love from ages 6-12. I've liked every Sonic game ever released, even Sonic '06. Yes, Sonic '06. Some of you may be staring at the computer with your mouth wide open, others may be shaking your head in despair. But it's true. So just sit back, relax, and enjoy the review.

There are two stories from which you can choose from: Hero and Dark. Throughout each story, you will alternate between three different characters. On the Hero side, you will play as Sonic, Tails, and Knuckles, and on the Dark side, you will play as Shadow, Rouge, and Eggman. Sonic and Shadow make for high-speed levels, Knuckles and Rouge are treasure hunting, and Tails and Eggman make for shooting stages. There's also an obvious rivalry between the characters and their equivalents; physical confrontations are not uncommon.

Fight! Fight! Fight!

Sonic and Shadow make for speed stages in the game, and, as such, they are the most fun. Also, a new element has been added: grinding, and it is put to good use. As usual, you have to get your upgrades by yours. Sonic's secret upgrades from the first game--the Light Shoes, and the Ancient Light--return, and he also has new upgrades, such as the Bounce Bracelet, Magic Glove, and Flame Ring, which adds a fire effect to his new somersault move. Shadow's got all of Sonic's upgrades except for the Bounce Bracelet and Magic Glove (which really aren't that useful, anyway). Shadow's stages are usually a bit harder than Sonic's, but at the same time, he's often more fun. Maybe I'm just a Shadow fan?

Don't mock Shadow!

Knuckles and Rouge make for the infamous treasure hunting stages from the first game. However, since no characters share levels in this game, it doesn't feel as tacked on as Knuckles's stages from the first game. Also, the stages are bigger, making for harder, more fun Emerald hunts. But if things get too tough, you can always get a clue from one of the monitors.

Tails and Eggman make for E-102 Gamma-style shoot-em-up missions. Thankfully, there's no time limit anymore; you're free to take as long as you like. Also, you've got a much-needed health bar, so that you won't get killed if you get hit without any rings. Also, there's a new bonus points system: the more enemies you lock on to at once, the more points you get. Although Tails and Eggman are the least fun to play as, it's still stinkin' cool to play as a super-powerful mech!

While this game has a lot of the same stuff as its predecessor, it has something that SA1 seriously lacked: multiplayer. There are three modes: racing with Sonic and Shadow, hunting with Knuckles and Rouge, and shooting with Tails and Eggman. The main problem here is that the multiplayer has only a few stages, and gets old fast. However, if you have a friend, you can get some enjoyment out of it.

Sonic Adventure 2 gets a 5 out of 5. Although I usually regard SA1 as better than SA2, I guess it really ends in a tie. Both games have a distinct feeling to them.

It's Not Human...

noreply@blogger.com (T-Man) — Mon, 08 Sep 2008 01:35:00 +0000

Hey, here's something different! A manga review. I bet you weren't suspecting that after the game and music reviews I do more often. (I have posted one movie review, actually, and a few book reviews) This review is for the first volume of the series +Anima.

To start the review, this is what +Anima's are: people who have somehow gained special, animal-based powers and are considered misfits. The story of the series chronicles the adventures of a young crow +Anima accurately named Cooro, as he and his +Anima friends, Husky (fish), Senri (bear), and Nana (bat). Although they're the main group, I've done research and found that they will meet others like them.

But what got me interested in Japanese manga, you ask? Well, I was at a bookstore one day, and found manga—and, among them, Kingdom Hearts books. That day, I got the second volume of Kingdom Hearts and the first volume of Chain of Memories, and they were both really good. Then, one day, at Books-A-Million, they had a buy-two-get-one-free deal. I got both Kingdom Hearts manga they had that day and +Anima as a bonus.

I chose well.

The story starts with a circus ringmaster and his assistant, who caught a fish-tailed kid (Husky) in his net while fishing one day. Wanting to capitalize on this, he hires him to pose as a mermaid princess in exchange for pay. Watching from the opening of the tent, Cooro finds himself in trouble with the ringmaster, when he shows off his powers. Later, Husky threatens to leave with Cooro, which causes the ringmaster to tie Husky to a pole and tells Cooro that it’s a play in which he, the "Messenger of Death," captures the mermaid princess. Instead, he took Husky and flew out of there, and that's where the rest of the book ensues.

Overall, I give "+Anima" a 4 out of 5. I highly recommend it to any manga fan.

Words & Pictures....the sequel...

noreply@blogger.com (T-Man) — Fri, 22 Aug 2008 18:39:00 +0000

"You've got a plasma pistol, and I've got an assault rifle, and you won't beat me because you've got a plasma pistol, and the plasma pistol stinks, because I've got an assault rifle! HAH HOO HAH!!!"

YAY!! YEAH!!! WOOHOO!!! ...Can I stop floating now?

"Mustn't...stop...smiling... Try...to...ignore...flaming thumb..."

Y'know, E.T. was good for something; its case could easily be used to store complimentary Rece's pieces once the game was thoroughly cremated. Then again, you could probably do that with any case.

Use this alien-related case instead. That way, they won't get defiled by E.T.'s awfulness! ZIM cases can also be used for storing rubber piggies, spooky chihuahuas, and even moose!

Entire Halo Trilogy Completed...

noreply@blogger.com (T-Man) — Fri, 22 Aug 2008 04:42:00 +0000

One of my last game reviews (in the midst of at least half a dozen music reviews) was that of Halo 2. You see, as I have mentioned in three separate articles (this will make four), my mother had recently let me play Halo, and I wanted to beat each game in the trilogy. Actually, so far, I have completed each one on co-op mode with my cousin (with the exception of the last few levels on the first game, which I had to complete the rest of the way on my own because he got tired of it).

Like Halo 2, Halo 3 brings some new weapons into the mix. The game has flamethrowers, Brute spikers, gravity hammers, and many more. There are even different types of grenades! The assault rifle returns from the first game. It's more powerful, but only uses 32 shots per clip. The magnum is now much more powerful, with a four-headshot kill going for it. Dual wielding returns, which really isn't a surprise. However, the same "no melee and no grenades" rule applies. There are also several new vehicles, such as the Chopper and Prowler.

Rather than both players using Master Chief or the Arbiter in co-op, depending on the stage, one player controls Master Chief and the other controls the Arbiter, since they are now allies. Master Chief respawns with the Battle Rifle and Assault Rife, while the Arbiter, when he dies, respawns with the [rather crappy] Plasma Rifle and Covenant Carbine. The co-op runs much smoother than in previous games, with no slowdown whatsoever.

The game is no longer unbearably difficult when it comes to Flood missions. Melee simply OWNS them, not to mention that they're only in the last few levels of the game. In fact (spoiler), in one level they side with you. In that stage, it's best to hang around and let them kill the Covenant. They're also not nearly as abundant, also helping to make Flood-infested levels easier.

So What's Good?

+ You get to "finish the fight"
+ New weapons
+ Assault rifle is back
+ New vehicles
+ Co-op makes more sense story-wise
+ The Flood levels are easier
+ Great multiplayer and online play
+ Overall just more fun than the others
+ Phenomenal story, although this can be said for all the Halo games

…But Then What's Bad?

- Very minor, but the Arbiter always respawns with crappy weapons

Overall, Halo 3 receives a 5 out of 5. Sure, it's got all kinds of improvements, but it's overall simply more fun than the others. It is one of the greatest games I've ever played, just like its predecessors.

My First Words N' Pictures...

noreply@blogger.com (T-Man) — Mon, 18 Aug 2008 05:27:00 +0000

Wooooaaaaaaaah...

"Nintendo fanboy, your angel of death awaiiiiiits..."

"Uh...uh-uh...uh.... Hope no one notices the brown patch on these green clothes..."

Love lift us up...

"Farting at the speed of sound!"

"Look into my eyeeeeeeeeesssss...oh, wait, you can't."

And THAT, my friends, was my first and rather short words and pictures.

Star Fox Assaulted

noreply@blogger.com (T-Man) — Sun, 17 Aug 2008 20:01:00 +0000

It's been awhile since I did a review for an older game. I've been trying to only review new games or games I had recently beaten for the first time, which is probably why there have been so many music reviews. Still, I have opinions on games that I want to show the world, and Star Fox Assault is one of them.

Although most of us, at this point, have probably not played Star Fox Assault for years in favor of the overall much better Command, I feel like taking a break from my newer games every now and then. When I first played Star Fox Assault, I loved it, finding the ground-based combat a cool new feature (probably because I played on Bronze Mode). Now, however…that's not the case.

While I still find the Arwing missions fun and enjoyable, the ground-based missions just don't fit in the Star Fox formula…which is a problem, considering 60% of your time playing will be spent on the ground, hunting for Aparoid Hatchers or what-have-you. Several of them are tedious, some taking almost half an hour to complete. If you are going to buy the game or are just coming back to it, do yourself a favor and play on Bronze, the easiest difficulty.

The very first thing you'll notice when outside of your Arwing is that the controls don't feel right. It doesn't matter which control setting you use; it's always irresponsive, and the button mapping just doesn't work out. On the default control setting, turning the camera is a pain the butt because you have to stand perfectly still, leaving yourself open for a nearby attack.

There are also several problems with the weapons. The blaster has to be charged up to be worth a crap, and, since there are usually enemies everywhere, it's practically impossible to charge it up successfully. Its charged shot is also pretty much the only thing that can kill big enemies, and having to cycle through all your weapons to get to it leaves you vulnerable to attack. The machine and gattling guns are rapid fire weapons, but they are extremely weak and run out of ammo quickly. It's extremely hard to get a grenade to hit a target, and they're pretty much useless anyway. The sniper rifle can only be used for sniping, and nothing more. The only weapon that I can't think of any criticism for is the rocket launcher.

Returning from Star Fox 64 is the abysmal wingmate A.I., and it's worse than ever. You'll be searching for Aparoid Hatchers or whatever the level's target is, and then you get transmissions from your partners telling you to kill the guys behind them. Of course, what they expect you to do is hop in a Landmaster tank or Arwing and shoot the enemies down. Unfortunately, it's very annoying and hard to find them, so you'll think you can just forget it. But they bug you and bug you and BUG you literally until they die. It's worth it just to shut them up.

It's not all bad outside of the Arwing, though. The easier ground missions are a lot of fun. The hard/long ones aren't necessarily awful, but they are a lot more fun when playing on Bronze Mode. The multiplayer, however, is awesome! In multiplayer, you and a friend face off against each other, annihilating each other on foot, in the Landmaster, or in the Arwing. There are also other modes, such as controlling a rocket from a rocket launcher to hit your opponent with it. The only problem with the multiplayer is that there is no co-op for the Story Mode.

Aside from the poorly written dialogue and sometimes-abysmal voice acting, the story is pretty good. However, the game is extremely, unforgivably, and indubitably SHORT, having only 10 missions, and only a sparse few are played on-rails. Of course, there is replay value, like getting the medals, flags, and playing Survival Mode (a mode in which you play through the entire game without saving), but there is still no excuse for its short length.

So, to sum it all up for you…

So What's Good?

+ Arwing levels are still great
+ Easier on-foot missions are fun
+ Multiplayer is great
+ Replay value is pretty high

…But Then What's Bad?

- Some on-foot missions are hard/long
- The controls are hard to master on any setting
- Several weapons have flaws
- The wingmate A.I. is simply awful
- No co-op?
- Poorly-written scenes
- Inexcusably short length

Overall, Star Fox Assault receives a 3 out of 5. It's a fun game, but it needed more work.

You know, Welcome To The Black Parade is my favorite song now...

noreply@blogger.com (T-Man) — Wed, 06 Aug 2008 03:30:00 +0000

Considering that there has only been one game review in the midst of several music reviews, I want this to be the last music review I write for a while.

One music review to rule them all, one music review to bind them, one music review to…you know the rest.

Anyway, My Chemical Romance achieved massive success four years ago, with their album Three Cheers for Sweet Revenge, and released smash singles Helena and I'm Not Okay (I Promise). Yes, they were…quite overrated. Since I haven't heard many more than those two songs off their first CD (I've probably heard more, but that's all I remember), it's probably not exactly my place to say, but the only great song from that album that I've heard was Helena.

Either way, that doesn't change the fact that their latest CD, The Black Parade, is simply wonderful. Released two years ago, it is meant to be a story, with the songs being chapters in a book. With my 12-year-old lyric-deciphering abilities, I didn't necessarily get some of the lyrics, but I'll do the best I can…

Foreword: The End
Chapter 1: Dead!
Chapter 2: This Is How I Disappear
Chapter 3: The Sharpest Lives
Chapter 4: Welcome To The Black Parade
Chapter 5: I Don't Love You
Chapter 6: House of Wolves
Chapter 7: Cancer
Chapter 8: Mama
Chapter 9: Sleep
Chapter 10: Teenagers
Chapter 11: Disenchanted
Chapter 12: Famous Last Words (Contains Hidden "Chapter," Blood)

The first song, The End, is basically a foreword to open the CD. Since the main character of the story died already, this is told from Gerard's perspective, basically to say that he's about to tell the story of the main character. The second song, Dead!, is the beginning of the story. The main character's (who will from hereon be referred to as "Dude") father is in the hospital. Dude hated his father, so he's hoping that he dies. In This Is How I Disappear, Dude realizes that he loves his father, and doesn't want him to die.

Two chapters later, in Welcome To The Black Parade, Dude decides to make his father proud before he dies. He got together a band called the Black Parade, named after what Dude's father called death when Dude was a child, as described in the lyrics, "When I was a young boy, my father took me into the city to see a marching band / He said, 'Son, when you grow up, would you be the savior of the broken, the beaten, and the danged? / Cause one day, I'll leave you, a phantom, to lead you in the summer, to join the Black Parade.'" Dude performs a play, called the Black Parade, and shows off his lover.

However, the next day, things…don't go so well for Dude and the girl (even though it would be a better name for his sister, his girlfriend will from hereon be dubbed "Dudette"). It seems sort of sad that they didn't last for a day, which is said in the lyrics, "I don't love you, like I did yesterday." I do wonder why he found that he hated his girlfriend. Maybe he realized she was a mannequin that belonged in a store with male mannequins? (I watched the music video)

Later on, in Chapter 7, entitled "Cancer," Dude gets…cancer. He is then hospitalized, and the disease becomes terminal. In chapter 8, he writes a letter to his mom (or is he talking to her in person, or on the phone? I really don't know…) talking about how he never was able to do anything good with his life and he hates himself and the world for it. In the final chapter, entitled "Famous Last Words," he wants his former girlfriend to stay with him as he dies, and only if she does, he'll be satisfied with his life.

OK, now for the actual "review" part. It seemed awkward to me to talk about my opinion on the songs as I told the story, so I saved that for later. As implied by the title, I find Welcome To The Black Parade my favorite song of all-time. I'm serious! You see, I like songs that are basically rock anthems. So, yes, that's sudden, but either way…

I had actually heard Dead! before I got the CD, considering it was on the 360 version of GH2 and all. It was probably the best song on the whole thing, actually… That doesn't mean that's not saying much. Dead! rocks! It's not as good WTTBP, though…

In fact, the only two songs on the CD that DON'T rock are Mama and the hidden track, Blood. Mama is a simply abysmal song. That stupid accent Gerard puts on during that song, and just the way the song as a whole sounds…ugh. Blood is simply…odd.

To make this quick, I'll round up the rest of the best and cover them all in one paragraph. These songs are This Is How I Disappear, I Don't Love You, Teenagers, and Famous Last Words. Famous Last Words is the second best track on the CD, and a great way to end it. Of course, it contains that stupid hidden track, but whatever. I Don't Love You is also great. It's a somewhat softer, slower tune than the rest of my favorites, save Teenagers. This Is How I Disappear is the exact opposite, being a fast-paced, noisy tune. Teenagers is the only song in my favorites that my 12-year-old mind doesn't understand at all. Of course, if teenagers scare the livin' crap outta Dude, that's OK, but…how did he get so scared of teenagers? Whatever. It's a good song, anyway.

Awesome Songs:

Welcome To The Black Parade
Famous Last Words
I Don't Love You
Dead!
This Is How I Disappear
Teenagers

Great Songs:

Cancer
The Sharpest Lives
Sleep
Disenchanted
House of Wolves

Crappy Songs:

Mama
Blood

Overall, The Black Parade gets a 5 out of 5. Sure, there are a couple of cruddy songs, but the rest of the album is great. Besides, Welcome To The Black Parade is my favorite song now, so…

Halo There!!

noreply@blogger.com (T-Man) — Sun, 27 Jul 2008 20:59:00 +0000

Another review for a Halo game, another title pun. Sigh, if only I could think of better titles…

The review is for none other than Halo 2, the sequel to Halo: Combat Evolved, which I have only recently gotten to play. Yes, I have been missing out all this time.

As you were probably able to tell by my review of the original Halo, even though I liked it very much, I was hot and cold on some aspects of the game, such as the vehicles and the difficulty level. I was happy to see that several of these aspects were improved upon in Halo 2. This makes it a 5 out of 5 right off the bat. After all, I would have rated Halo 1 the exact same thing if it weren't for its flaws, considering how fun it was.

In Halo 2, you have the option of dual wielding certain weapons. It doesn't have to be two of the same weapon; you can have two different weapons, even having an alien gun and a human gun at the same time. As a consequence, however, while dual wielding, you can't use grenades or melee (you can do that, but you automatically drop your weapon if you do).

There are also a few new weapons. The assault rifle is no longer in the game. Instead, you have the battle rifle. It takes some getting used to, but it's stronger than the assault rifle and even has a scope so that you can zoom in. There is still a machine gun in the game, called the SMG. New Covenant arms include the Covenant Carbine, which is the Covenant equivalent of a battle rifle, the Energy Sword, which was in the first game even though you couldn't use it, the Beam Sniper, which is a Covenant sniper rifle, and a few others.

Some old weapons have changed since the first game. The rocket launcher now has a lock-on feature for more precise shots, and its range has been moderated so that you don't get killed if you shoot one and it hits an enemy two miles away. The pistol, which I grew to like in the first game, has been changed to the magnum. You have to use two of them at once for them to be worth a crap in this game, which is a small disappointment. The Needler is now much more powerful, and using two of them together is devastating.

The vehicles have also changed a lot since the first game. The Warthog is easier to control than in the first game, and the framerate doesn't drop as much while riding it in co-op. The Scorpion's main cannon is much more accurate, and it doesn't take an hour to charge up. Its machine gun is more powerful, too. The body now moves independently from the turret, providing better control. While this means that you can no longer sit on it while a friend drives it during co-op, you can still hitch a ride by simply jumping on it. This is actually more convenient, because you can aim in all directions. The Ghost has more grip, and also has a boost function. The Banshee also has a boost function, and you can also perform tricks while driving it and it can shoot bombs. You can ride the Wraiths in this game, but they're not very fun. Another great feature is that, rather than having to kill the enemy in the vehicle and risking destroying the vehicle along with the enemy in order to ride it, you can jack them.

Another great thing is that the difficulty of the game has been toned down. The Fludd don't pour into the room and quickly kill you like in the previous game, and they can't come back to life unless a tiny Fludd crawls into a bigger one, so if you kill all the small ones, you shouldn't have many problems. Of course, there are still annoying parts, but they're not nearly as abundant.

Overall, Halo 2 receives a 5 out of 5. It is a great sequel, although the (spoiler) unsatisfactory ending would probably have annoyed me if Halo 3 wasn't out by the time I got to play it.

This game has received a T-MAN'S GAMES T-MAN'S CHOICE AWARD.

One Republic of Greatness

noreply@blogger.com (T-Man) — Fri, 25 Jul 2008 03:55:00 +0000

The famous pop-rock band One Republic struck gold last year with their album, Dreaming Out Loud, and released hit singles Apologize and Stop & Stare. Before Father-dear got the album, the only song I had ever heard was Apologize (the Timbaland remix), and, me being against the entire existence of teeny bop and all, I hated it at that time. Since then, however, I've grown to like it, and I have realized that it is actually one of the best songs on their CD…and it has a LOT of good songs. Here is the track list:

Mercy
Apologize
Stop & Stare
Tyrant
Sleep
Goodbye Apathy
All We Are
Someone to Save You
Dreamin' Out Loud
Too Easy
Prodigal

Coming to open the CD is the best song, Mercy. It is a fast-paced tune that really hits you with how great it is when you listen to it. Apologize is okay in its normal form, but the Timbaland remix (which is a bonus track on the album) is ironically a lot better. The third song, Stop & Stare, is actually the second best song on the CD. Unfortunately, the fourth track, Tyrant, is one of the few cruddy songs on the album…

The next track, Sleep, doesn't really do much to save it, either. That's not to say it's bad, but it's just simply "ok." Thankfully, Goodbye Apathy returns the album to greatness. The rest of the songs from that point on are great, sans the penultimate song, Too Easy.

Best Songs:

Mercy
Apologize (Timbaland remix)
Stop & Stare
Someone to Save You
Dreamin' Out Loud

Good Songs:

Apologize
Sleep
Goodbye Apathy
All We Are
Prodigal

Worst Songs:

Tyrant
Too Easy

Overall, Dreaming Out Loud receives a 4 out of 5. I don't like pop, I like One Republic! (I guess it doesn't count, though, since they're pop-rock)

Viva La Awesome

noreply@blogger.com (T-Man) — Wed, 23 Jul 2008 23:44:00 +0000

Much as the world turns, Coldplay is generally not that good. They have several little gems in their albums, such as Yellow or In My Place, which in turn become smash hits with the public. But from what I've heard from my dear old dad (I mention him in yet another music review), most of their stuff is just plain boring. Judging by the fact that I simply detest musicians such as Damien Rice and James Blunt, both of whom he enjoys, I would more than likely think so, too.

I still wanted to listen to their new album, Viva La Vida or Death and All His Friends, all the way through. When I did, I was actually in for a pleasant surprise. There was only one song that was crappy, and the rest were great. Here is the track list:

Life in Technicolor
Cemeteries of London
Lost
42
Lovers in Japan/Reign of Love
Yes
Viva La Vida
Violet Hill
Strawberry Swing
Death and All His Friends (Contains Hidden Track, The Escapist)

The first track, Life in Technicolor, is just another intro, featuring a quiet synthesizer tune. Cemeteries of London is the first real song of the album, and it's really good. Its follow-up, Lost, is actually one of the best songs on the album.

Unfortunately, 42, the next song, is a bore to listen to. It picks up toward the end, but that part is just…stupid. Thankfully, most of the next song, Lovers in Japan/Reign of Love is better, although the end of it is mostly boring piano. Whatever. 42 is actually the only completely crappy song.

The album goes back to the good stuff with Yes, however. Then comes Viva La Vida. It is by far the best song on the album. It is the story of a king, who…wasn't a very good king. Thus, he is overthrown, and loses everything. At least, that's what the lyrics imply. However, it could be a metaphor for losing your love, as everything seems to be these days. Violet Hill is the album's second best song, a nice tune about someone taking their love to the place that he grew up, and telling her the history of the place. Yet, she wouldn't tell him he loved her back, and let him go. It's actually a song about a place, and unrequited love.

The final track on the album, Death and All His Friends, is the "sequel" to Viva La Vida. In it, the king/lover in question decides to go along with whatever happens, as implied in the lyrics: "I don't wanna cycle or recycle revenge, I don't wanna follow death and all of his friends." At the beginning, there is soft piano music and soft lyrics, but toward the end, there is some soft guitar and the lyrics become more pronounced. It also contains a hidden track, The Escapist. It is a beautiful little tune, and a great way to end the CD.

Best Songs:

Lost
Viva La Vida
Violet Hill
Death and All His Friends

Good Songs:

Life in Technicolor
Cemeteries of London
Lovers in Japan/Reign of Love
Yes
Strawberry Swing

Worst Song:

42

Overall, Coldplay's new album, Viva La Vida or Death and All His Friends, receives a 4 out of 5. Coldplay's band members have discovered something they should have discovered a long time ago: you don't have to be boring to be sincere and meaningful.

30 Minutes Grace

noreply@blogger.com (T-Man) — Tue, 22 Jul 2008 18:10:00 +0000

Guess I've finally been able to think of better titles, eh? Well, anyway, I have recently gotten into the band Three Days Grace, having put every song from their new album One – X on my MP3 player.

Anyway, notice the title. Does it imply anything? Yes, the album is half the length of an average rock album. I was playing the second-to-last level on Star Fox Assault while listening to it. It's a long level, surely…but not long enough to excusably complete an entire rock album before completing the level. This is a major problem because I really liked the album, sans about three of the twelve songs. Anyway, here are the songs:

It's All Over
Pain
Animal I Have Become
Never Too Late
On My Own
Riot
Get Out Alive
Let It Die
Over and Over
Time of Dying
Gone Forever
One – X

The song that opens the album, It's All Over, is pretty good. Speaking out against drug abuse, it is a good way to open the album. It opens with a soft synthesizer tune, and then making a transition to noisy guitar, after which it goes acoustic. Transitions between loud rock guitar and soft acoustic guitar are something you'll see a lot of in the album. Though it opened well, the second song is, ummm….

"Paiiiiiiin, without love,
Paiiiiiiiiin, I can't get enough,
Paiiiiiin, I like it rough,
Cause I'd rather feel pain than nothing at all."

Ugh. Yes, those were lyrics from the second song of the album, entitled, surprise surprise, Pain. The very beginning isn't a good start to the song, but at least the song gets better as you listen.

Thankfully, the third song, Animal I Have Become, is One – X's gem. Following in the style of bands such as Linkin Park and, in some ways (thankfully not many), the album's previous song, it is an angst-stricken tune about someone having become very angry at the world and mean, and wanting his family and friends to help him out of this. At least, that's the way I see it.

Never Too Late is the song you've probably heard a lot of if you've been listening to the radio for the past month or so. It's actually the SECOND best song of the album. Once again, some angst touches. The story is about a person's girlfriend/wife hating her life and wanting to commit suicide, although the person the song is about is trying to convince her not to.

However, with many albums I review, with every string of good songs comes a bad song at the end. Riot is probably the WORST song on the album. OK, so, would you be so mad at people who dislike you that you would want to start a riot? Really? Well, then, LET'S START A RIOT!! LET'S START A RIOT!! And so on, and so forth. Seriously, it's that dumb. At least the rest of the songs are good…

Sans Gone Forever. The evil doppelganger of Never Too Late, the song is about a person who is HAPPY his girlfriend/wife is dead because it means he can "get drunk and fight" and do stuff like that. The music sounds okay, but the lyrics are abysmal.

Best Songs:

Animal I Have Become
Never Too Late
Time of Dying
One – X

Good Songs:

It's All Over
On My Own
Get Out Alive
Let It Die
Over and Over

Worst Songs:

Pain
Riot
Gone Forever

Overall, One – X receives a 4 out of 5. Those three bad songs aren't a big deal; the album just should have been a lot longer.

This Leaf Doesn't Fly...

noreply@blogger.com (T-Man) — Mon, 21 Jul 2008 18:03:00 +0000

Flyleaf's debut album came out three years ago, and achieved them massive success. Three singles were released: I'm So Sick, Fully Alive, and that song that follows you everywhere on the radio, All Around Me. Like Daughtry and Alicia Keyes, it plays so much that it's almost annoying. Sure, it's their best song…

But that's not saying much.

How did I end up with the album, then? Well, my good old dad (I bring him up in every music review, it seems) heard, surprise surprise, All Around Me on some movie. Finding it to his liking, he got the album. After listening to it once, he never paid it any mind, saying that Fully Alive and All Around Me were the only songs that were worth a crap. At first, I hated them too, sans I'm So Sick and All Around Me.

Then, one day, since Dad had gotten all sorts of new albums, I decided to get everything that was already on my MP3 player off (temporarily) and stuff it full of as many new albums it could hold. Among these were One X (Three Days Grace), Viva La Vida or Death and All His Friends (Coldplay), Don't You Fake It [Deluxe Edition] (The Red Jumpsuit Apparatus), and Flyleaf, as I thought it would only be fair to give them a second try.

There are ten songs on the album:

I'm So Sick
Fully Alive
Perfect
Cassie
Sorrow
I'm Sorry
All Around Me
Breathe Today
There For You
So I Thought

I'm So Sick opens the album. It's the second best song on the album, next to All Around Me. Their hard rock image is shown from the first song on. It's really the only song with screaming in it. It's a good way to open up their first album. The hard rock tune carries over to Fully Alive, although it's not as good as the previous song. I know that Fully Alive has been inspired by some other type of rock, but whatever…

The first three songs on the album are OK, but the fourth track (called Cassie) is simply…atrocious. Hearing the sound of Lacey Mosley's voice in that song...think of a girl version of the lead singer of System of a Down, except slightly better, with better, yet still terrible, lyrics. It's about a girl named Cassie who "pulled the trigger," but I didn't catch much more than that. Thankfully, Sorrow and I'm Sorry return the band to their normal selves.

All Around Me is the seventh song on the album. It is by far their best song, despite its constant radio airplay that is beginning to get on my nerves. I actually watched a music video for it…and it was not good. Just a bunch of crazy, unfitting dance moves and the wall being periodically painted different colors. Whatever. After All Around Me comes, unfortunately, Breathe Today. OK, not all of that song is crappy, but a lot of it involves Lacey Mosley just rhythmically talking, like rap. It's not just like rap, but I don't usually like talking mixed with singing…

The last two songs, There For You and So I Thought, are much more sincere than the other songs on the album. With nice, clean acoustic guitar, with some soft electric guitar thrown in there to mix things up a bit, they're definitely up there with I'm So Sick and All Around Me.

Good Songs:

I'm So Sick
All Around Me
There For You
So I Thought

O-K Songs:

Fully Alive
Perfect
Sorrow
I'm Sorry

Bad Songs:

Cassie
Breathe Today

Overall, Flyleaf's self-titled debut album receives a 2 out of 5. Only 40% of the album's songs are actually good (yes, I did the math), but I'm not going to crap on them. I believe that their next album can be great, if they try to better.

Good Morning, Revival!

noreply@blogger.com (T-Man) — Tue, 15 Jul 2008 18:55:00 +0000

It’s been many months since I did my last music review, for Inhuman Rampage, by Dragonforce (2006). Now, I’m back with a review for Good Charlotte’s new album Good Morning Revival (2007)! I’ve also noticed how cheesy my review titles have been lately, although this is the best I got…

Though I’ve never really been particularly interested in Good Charlotte, I’ve always liked them. The Anthem and Girls and Boys were the main two songs I ever heard, although I may have heard others in my life. During Thanksgiving of last year, I watched the Thanksgiving Parade, where I saw Good Charlotte performing Dance Floor Anthem live. This ultimately got me interested in their new album, which I ultimately ended up getting.

There are a total of 15 songs on the album, and they are:

Good Morning Revival
Misery
The River
Dance Floor Anthem (I Don’t Wanna Be in Love)
Keep Your Hands off My Girl
Victims of Love
Where Would We Be Now
Break Apart Her Heart
All Back
Beautiful Place
Something Else
Broken Hearts Parade
March On
Keep Your Hands off My Girl (remix)
Face the Strange

Although, most of the time, the song which an album is named after is the album’s lead single, although Good Morning Revival is just a short intro with harmonizing voices like a chorus. Once that’s over, Misery plays. During that song, you can tell that Good Charlotte is going in a different direction from their previous songs (at least, the ones I've heard). The song, and the rest of the album has more electronica and sounds a lot more like pop. I don’t like pop, but I do like most of the album.

The fourth track on the album, called Dance Floor Anthem (I Don’t Wanna Be in Love), is probably my favorite Good Charlotte song. It tells the story of a woman who breaks up with her husband, despite the fact that the husband was trying to keep her happy any way he could. The sound of the guitar at some points is reminiscent of 80’s pop, although it goes perfectly with the rest of the song. Unfortunately, Keep Your Hands off My Girl comes after that. It is a mix of punk and rap…mostly rap. It also has a remix later on in the album, which isn’t much better. Just avoid both versions at all costs. Although Victims of Love is a lot better than the previous song, it is too heavy on the “teeny bop” influence, techno sounds dominating the song and thus making it the second worst song on the album.

Fortunately, Where Would We Be Now helps to get the bad taste of the previous two songs out of your mouth. With soft keyboard music, and soft, harmonizing vocals, it’s one of the more sincere songs on the album. Break Apart Her Heart returns to the rock-pop sound, however. All Black tells the story of a person who has a gothic girlfriend, who has caused him to become a goth himself. Though fast paced, it has a more melancholy tune and lyrics, akin to Misery, which carries on to Beautiful Place.

Great Songs:

Misery
Dance Floor Anthem (I Don’t Wanna Be in Love)
Where Would We Be Now
All Black

Good Songs:

Good Morning Revival
The River
Break Apart Her Heart
Beautiful Place
Something Else
Broken Hearts Parade
March On
Face the Strange

Bad Songs:

Keep Your Hands off My Girl
Victims of Love
Keep Your Hands off My Girl (remix)

Overall, Good Charlotte’s new album Good Morning Revival receives a 3 out of 5. Although not outstanding, the album does have some real winners.

Oh, Halo!

noreply@blogger.com (T-Man) — Sat, 12 Jul 2008 22:03:00 +0000

Fourscore and two posts ago, I posted a huge announcement: I was allowed to play Halo. Yes. Halo.

While anyone reading this may be surprised that I wasn’t allowed to play it since I was 9 or 10, keep in mind that my mother dislikes trigger-button-shooters. Mainly, she dislikes me playing them. I don’t know why; she’s always been like that. It didn’t matter that you were killing aliens/diseases; it didn’t matter that at 11 I was shooting a BB gun at my grandparents’ house. It wasn’t until this year, at 12, that my mother finally decided to let me play Halo. She still dislikes the thought of me playing war games, since you’re killing people, but I’m sure Halo is better than any of those. I also believe this has opened the door to any shooters in which you’re not killing humans; I’ve put Resistance: Fall of Man on my Christmas list, actually. (Yes, I’ve already gotten started on my Christmas list…and I know that Resistance II is coming out, but I want the first one for Christmas to see if I like it, and get Resistance II for my birthday if I do). If you want to learn more, read my post entitled, “Halo Everybody!!”

Although Mom didn’t want me playing Halo, she didn’t mind if I learned the story. I already knew a lot about it to begin with, and had seen the endings of Halo 1 and Halo 3 because of my cousin’s intense Halo obsession. I’ve probably seen the ending of Halo 2 as well, but I’ll probably have to beat the game and see it again to remember. Currently, Halo: Combat Evolved and its successors could probably pass as the most story-driven shooters ever made. Of course, I love the story. Very much.

However, the gameplay doesn’t exactly fare as well anymore. Although the game is still a blast to play, lots of crap comes with it. Since the game has 12 levels, I like to mentally separate the game into halves of six levels each. During the first half, you’re only fighting the Covenant. When it’s just the Covenant, the game can be a blast to play on Normal, minus the last level of the first half, known as the Canyon. Don’t make me relive that…

Once the first half is over, the Fludd step in. After the Jenkins cutscene in the seventh level (which is, of course, awesome), Fludd immediately start pouring into the room. They’re everywhere! Everywhere!! The big ones (people or Covenant who have been turned into Fludd, or several small ones clumped together, which diffuse in an explosion when they get near you) are the ones you really need to watch out for, although the small ones can get very annoying in groups. Although the first couple of Fludd levels aren’t so bad on Normal (at least in co-op), the others need to be played on Easy to be fun at all. This is due to the fact that Fludd can close you in small corridors. Then, when you think you’re about to escape, one throws a grenade, which kills you immediately…even if you have a full shield and full health. Not to mention the Fludd often come back to life like zombies. Ugh.

Another thing is the range of the Fludd attacks, grenades, and rocket launcher shots. Several times, I’ve been looking at a Fludd that is five feet away. It punches the air, and it hurts me as if it were standing right in front of me. Also, if you throw a grenade and it lands half a mile away from you, you have to move 10 feet backwards or you’ll die from the grenade blast. And this happened to my cousin when we were playing co-op, and he ultimately made us quit because of it: he shot a rocket from all the way across a long hallway, and the blast killed him.

There are also issues with the vehicles in Halo: Combat Evolved. The Warthog has zero grip, forcing it to turn over several times. Also, when riding it during co-op, the framerate goes ballistic. The Ghost also has no grip. While this is more forgivable, considering it doesn’t touch the ground, it needs some grip to be fun to control. During co-op, accidentally gently touching your teammates with a vehicle that doesn’t even touch the ground will kill them immediately. While in the Scorpion (a tank), a charged shot from a plasma pistol will immediately annihilate your shield, despite the fact that you’re actually INSIDE the tank. The Scorpion’s machine gun is extremely weak. Although devastating if it DOES hit something, the Scorpion’s main cannon is extremely inaccurate, and it takes an hour of charging before you are able to use it again. Though the least of the vehicle-related issues, you can’t ride the Wraiths…

The graphics for the game are great for their time. Despite the fact that the human characters’ mouths move as though they are ventriloquist dummies, everything else looks almost real, such as Master Chief’s suit.

Overall, Halo: Combat Evolved receives a 4 out of 5. Although it has great graphics, fun factor, and story, issues with the vehicles and a nightmarish difficulty in the second half of the game prevent it from getting a perfect score. I’ve played Halo 2, and it’s a lot better. I still say that Halo 1 is “Holy Crap” worthy, though.

This game has received a T-MAN’S GAMES T-MAN’S CHOICE AWARD.

My 5 Japanese Anime Pet Peeves

noreply@blogger.com (T-Man) — Thu, 10 Jul 2008 04:01:00 +0000

Many Japanese anime shows can be great, especially movies, such as Spirited Away and Akira. Some can be so great that they are referenced in other Japanese pop culture, such as in Final Fantasy VII, during the cutscene in which Sephiroth walked through the flames (a reference to a similar scene with Tetsuo in Akira) Some can be so great that they can inspire some American movies, such as The Matrix. Some, however, are plagued with at least one of these five things. Some of them only apply for American dubs. Others, however, are solely the fault of the idiots who originally created the show.

Pet Peeve Number One: Unneeded Censorship (Sonic X)

America is subject to some of the highest censorship standards in the world. In Japan, anime can get by with smoking, drinking, death reference, cursing, and blood by the bucketful and Japanese kids still love it. In America, however, there is an ongoing belief that kids are wusses. After all, Jonny Quest was taken off the air because of parental watchdog groups calling it too violent, and also commenting on the use of weaponry and on-screen deaths. In order to placate parents who believe that kids shouldn’t watch SpongeBob SquarePants because it says the word “butt” in it, people oftentimes have to heavily censor anime. Sometimes it is necessary, but other times, people take it a wee bit too far.

I’ll take the 4Kids dub of Sonic X, for instance. I’m sure some of it needed to be censored, as is the nature of anime. Still, they made an effort to remove any and all reference of death. For instance, when the show was adapting Sonic Adventure 2, rather than leaving it be, they thought, “Maria shouldn’t die! Then, young Sonic fans who play the much more mature games won’t be able to watch the show! Let’s have her get taken away, instead!” Thus, a scene that came out of an E-rated game was censored like crazy. This is also apparent when the show-specific character Cosmo dies. An otherwise touching scene involving Tails not wanting her to die because of his love for her was censored to within an inch of its existence. Yeah, bad.

Pet Peeve Number Two: Mid-Battle Transformations, a.k.a. “But you haven’t seen my most powerful form!” (Dragon Ball Z)

Unlike the first one, this is the fault of the people who created Dragon Ball Z in the first place. Now, if I were Frieza, I would want to exterminate everyone quickly by immediately transforming into my Final Form. But no, instead Frieza waited until the Saiyans nearly wasted him to transform into his second form. Then, Piccolo had to come and deal out some damage before Frieza decided to transform again…and then again. But he still hadn’t taken the time to reach his 100% Full Power form. Also, if I were Goku, I would immediately go Super Saiyan 3 and annihilate everything, but thankfully I’m NOT Goku…

Pet Peeve Number Three: Stopping to Talk in the Middle of a Fight, a.ka. “You don’t have what it takes to be a Saiyan elite!” (Dragon Ball Z)

Another thing that I used Dragon Ball Z to represent. Anyway, HEY JAPANESE ANIMATORS!!! THERE’S A THING WE AMERICANS CALL FIGHTING!!! HAVE YOU HEARD OF IT?!! Though I wouldn’t be able to understand the answer coming from the person I was asking, the answer is in the TV shows they make.

Another thing that falls into this area is the refusal to fight, able to be detected by people standing there and saying nothing but, “Ah…ah…ah…” as if they were filling their diapers with tiny, hard, constipation turds. It’s terrible all the same.

Pet Peeve Number Four: People Talking to Themselves, a.k.a. “Ah!” (Pokemon)

I’ve seen this in far too many anime shows, but to represent this, I will choose Pokemon. Now, I hate Pokemon. With a passion, in fact. Though there are many...many reasons why I hate it, I noticed this happen a lot when I used to watch it. In lots of anime, people will talk to themselves, and I find it annoying. But Pokemon and a few others took it one step further with “Ah!” This is what happens: during an intense moment, the screen will split to show some of the spectators saying “Ah!” It’s annoying. Very much so.

Final Pet Peeve: Abysmal Dubbing, a.k.a. “Hah, hoo, hah!!!” (Speed Racer)

This is all too common in localized anime. It’s gotten much better since the old days, surely, but it’s still common. For instance, I have a tape of Sonic the Hedgehog: The Movie, that has been around in the U.S. since about the time that Sonic Adventure came out. I like it very much, but get this: Sonic actually says to Metal Sonic, “You may know everything I’m going to do, but that won’t help you because I know everything you’re going to do!! Strange, isn’t it?!!” Not to mention the terrible voices chosen for some of the characters. Tails’s voice is the whiniest it’s ever been, and Sonic sounds like a girl. At least it’s better than Speed Racer.

Actually, I’ve never watched Speed Racer, and thank God I haven’t. However, if I was ever up in the wee hours of the morning, I would watch Astro Boy on Cartoon Network. I noticed how everyone talked so fast, and if I made up a scenario in which someone crapped a turd, it would sound something like this, “You crapped a turd, and I don’t wanna smell it, because it stinks, because you crapped a turd! Hah, hoo, hah!!!” Astro Boy didn’t have the “hah-hoo-hahs,” at least, but from what I know about Speed Racer, it did.

So, there you have it. My five Japanese anime pet peeves. I’m not saying all anime stinks, because I like some anime (mostly movies). Still, I am always disappointed to see any of these five things in anime.

I don't know if all of the quotes I put in the section titles were accurate, but they are just there to reflect upon the ultimate stupidity in these frequently-occurring anime mistakes.

Halo Everybody!!!

noreply@blogger.com (T-Man) — Wed, 09 Jul 2008 04:31:00 +0000

Yesterday, a very important announcement was made to me. This message was from my mother, who actively opposes all shooting or M-rated games. She said it right to my face:

“You can play Halo.”

After hearing these words, I was completely flabbergasted. I almost passed out. As my blood pressure rose, and my breathing sped up, I managed to choke out, “Why?” Of course, I had wanted to all my life, but my mother disliked the thought of me playing a trigger-button shooting game, because she felt that the experience was too realistic. It was as if she had set up an iron barricade separating me from Halo, which only she could penetrate. For years, me and my diehard Halo-fan cousin have been trying to break that barricade with our own rocket launchers and plasma rifles, but my mother’s own army of Spartans foiled our plans every time. But yesterday, she tore the wall down. That wall, which separated me from Halo, much like the Berlin Wall separated the East Germans from freedom in West Germany, had been torn down.

The reason was, plain and simple: Mother dear had come to her senses. I had watched movies in which tons of people died on several occasions, and neither of my parents even batted an eye. Plus, you were killing aliens, not people. I also feel that Mom letting me play the rated-M-for-no-worthy-reason Oblivion had opened a mental door of some sort, but who cares what kind of paranormal forces were involved?! I get to play Halo!!!

Yes, yesterday was a great day for me. Oh, what a wonderful day it was.

Wanting to experience the story from the start, I began playing Halo: Combat Evolved on my 360. I was eager to begin gunning down Covenant, but a good portion of the beginning was spent running through corridors AVOIDING Covenant instead of showering them with lead coming out of an assault rifle. This did not detract at all, for I knew the action would begin. Soon.

When Cortana’s disc had been firmly inserted into our hero’s helmet, I got a pistol. Unfortunately, there was no ammo. At all. I got some eventually, but that’s when I realized: the pistol SUCKS EGGS!!! I needed something with better rapid fire capabilities, something that could easily overwhelm the grunts and other Covenant I would encounter. Something like…the assault rifle! Thankfully, mere seconds after getting ammo for my pistol, I found one. That was the end for the pitiful Covenant that had stupidly boarded the ship.

I was having fun. Some of the most fun I had ever had in any video game…ever. I called Dad in specifically to say, “Holy crap, this is awesome!!” Never once before have I played a game that has been worthy of saying “Holy Crap” over, or call my dad in just to tell him how awesome it is (not that he didn’t know). Oh, yes, Halo is awesome. So awesome. So unbelievably awesome…

After successfully escaping the ship, the escape pod crash-landed on a nearby Halo, on which I was forced to look for survivors. This was fun at first, and in fact introduced me to the Warthog. The Warthog is one of many, many Halo vehicles. It’s fun to ride around in as one of your guys mans a turret and guns down everything in your path, but the controls take some getting used to. Now, although I had fun at first, searching for survivors became tedious, especially with the Covenant hiding everywhere and quickly overwhelming me and killing me about 20 times (I’m evidently not a master at evasive action). Thank God for frequent checkpoints. Yes, due to my inexperience with FPS games, I stink at Halo. Hardcore. Still, playing Halo has been an overall enriching experience. I have thanked my mother at least 20 times because of this. Though I’m currently terrible at Halo (nothing hardcore playing won’t fix), I love it. I am currently stuck on the finding-survivors mission, but I’ll be back for more. Definitely.

A Good Game with a Not-So-Good Prequel

noreply@blogger.com (T-Man) — Wed, 25 Jun 2008 02:00:00 +0000

Though Sonic and the Secret Rings is by far my least favorite Sonic game, directly above it are the Game Gear games and then the original Sonic Riders. Sonic R has been my favorite Sonic racing game until now because you were on foot and burning rubber, but that mediocre boarding game…might as well have not existed. I mean, Sonic is about running, not boarding against some whacko parrot voiced by none other than the Tom Kenny, the voice of SpongeBob SquarePants (yes, you read right). I had taken the time to play it, and it was “ok,” but it just wasn’t good. Then, a couple of years later, a sequel came out for the Wii, known as Sonic Riders: Zero Gravity. As you can well imagine, I did not plan on buying it.

My 6-year-old sister, however, had other plans. Since she liked the first one, she intended to get it for her birthday. I wasn’t going to criticize her; she likes everything I don’t like. Still, I always thought that Zero Gravity would probably be better than the original. Once I played it, it turned out I was exactly right. It was better. Much better.

This must surely be a sign, as Sonic has been as of late going through a bad streak that has caused many ex-fans to wish him away, myself not included. I will, however, admit that the latest Sonic games from 2005-2007 have been disappointing, minus the Sonic Rush games for DS (as for Sonic Rivals…I’ve never played that). Shadow the Hedgehog was fun, but it did not live up to expectations and was REALLY short (in case you’re wondering, I thought that the trailers for it made it look like one of the great games of our time). Sonic Riders, as mentioned before, was a mediocre attempt at a sixth-gen Sonic racing game. Sonic the Hedgehog was a MAJOR disappointment. Sonic ran soooo slowly (and on a next-gen console, too), and there were so many glitches and the load times were unbearably long. As for Sonic and the Secret Rings…don’t get me started on that. There is still Mario & Sonic At the Olympic Games, which was simply NOT GOOD. I’ve also had fears that Sonic Chronicles and Sonic Unleashed would be terrible, considering that each one gets increasingly worse. However, Sonic Riders: Zero Gravity shows a glimmer of light in a possibly dark future.

For one thing, there is no longer an Air Gauge to measure how much fuel your Gear has; this means no more running to a pit stop on foot. As a consolation, the Air Dash and Air Slide are gone, although it’s a fair trade. You have something to replace that anyway. Rather than an Air Gauge, you have a Gravity Gauge, which gives you limited control over gravity. This allows you to make sharp turns by pressing the 1 Button, and can also allow you to fly by quickly pushing the Wii Remote up. While flying, you can bounce off certain objects to gain a burst of speed and also get more Gravity Points. The flight power also allows you to use certain shortcuts that only certain characters can usually enter. There is also a way to ride along walls, although it mostly falls out of your use.

There are three available control styles, although the sideways control style is the best. You hold the Wii Remote forward to accelerate, and move it left and right to steer. The 1 Button allows you to use a Gravity Drift (as mentioned earlier), and the 2 Button allows you to jump and do tricks. Speaking of which, tricks are a lot easier to do than they were in the original. No longer will you be in the middle of a trick and then land, causing you to lose all of your former speed. Instead, you just have to press the 2 Button at the right time and flick the Wii Remote in the direction in which you want to do the trick. The farther you are on the ramp when you press the 2 Button and the harder you flick the Wii Remote, the better the trick will be and thus you will get more Gravity Points.

Another thing I like is that the difficulty has been toned down significantly. No longer will you get hit by a fellow racer and lose all your rings, be back at level 1, and have lost all your speed. Now, the only way for a racer to hit you is if they get a power-up in one of the capsules that lets them turbo run on foot with a special power ready to own the next person they touch, although they thankfully aren’t too common. In fact, you’ll probably end up getting them more often than the fellow racers. This power can also reveal new shortcuts, usually involving hitting springs. As mentioned earlier, the Air Gauge is gone, thereby toning down the difficulty even more. While I’m at it, I will point out that the annoying announcer from the first game is no longer there, although it kind of makes you wonder why they’re racing when there’s no tournament going on…

Like the original, Sonic Riders: Zero Gravity follows the example set by Sonic Heroes of adding an ability triangle. Each character has a rank: speed, flight, or power. The power characters can mow down obstacles in their path, and thus uncover new shortcuts. Speed characters can grind along rails to speed things up. Flight characters can find shortcuts if they go across certain ramps. This allows them to fly through dash rings and discover new areas. However, there is a flaw in this. The characters don’t come with the abilities; you instead have to collect enough rings in order to switch to the appropriate Gear. I have no problem with this Gear Change system, but it should have been different. While I’m at it, depending on how many rings you get, you can press A to change your gear for a higher speed, the appropriate vehicle for grinding/destroying obstacles/flying, and a Gravity Gauge upgrade. Again, though I think it’s neat, the abilities should have come with the characters. Also like the original, Sonic Riders: Zero Gravity follows Sonic Adventure 2’s example by giving the Babylon Rogues alternate versions of Team Sonic’s stages.

Before closing my review, I will overview the graphics. Now, though graphics aren’t important to a racing game, it is still nice to see one with pretty graphics, and this delivers. It’s got the same style as the original game’s graphical style, which was pretty good, aside from the way some of the characters’ mouths moved during scenes. The cutscenes are also a noticeable improvement, not that cutscenes in Sonic games aren’t ALWAYS awesome.

While the first Sonic Riders was a rent at best, Sonic Riders: Zero Gravity is worth buying. If you were like me and didn’t like the first one, I still recommend you look into this; SEGA definitely put effort into it. This is definitely a sign that Sonic was just going through a bad streak, but now he’s getting back on track. I’ve seen trailers for Sonic Unleashed, and I think it looks awesome; not as good as the Sonic Adventure games, surely, but awesome. I’m still a little worried about Sonic Chronicles, unless it has a Tales of Symphonia-style battle system—I think that Sonic and turn-based battles don’t mix. Anyway…

Here Are the Words…

Gameplay: Pretty Good. A major improvement over the original; you can tell that Sonic Team actually tried to make this one good.
Fun Factor: Great! The original was so hard it was barely fun at all, but with this one’s toned-down difficulty and new gravity-manipulating mechanics, it can be quite a blast to play.
Graphics: Great! They shine, especially during cutscenes, but I don’t like the way the characters’ mouths move during scenes…
Glitches: Pretty Good. They’re there, but they’re not very major.
Story: Pretty Good. Though a story is not significant for a racing game, it’s pretty cool and interesting.

Final Word: Pretty Good. A significant improvement over the first. Now there is a bright glimmer of hope in this hedgehog’s future.

I'm Going Commando!!

noreply@blogger.com (T-Man) — Mon, 23 Jun 2008 18:38:00 +0000

Hello beautiful people of planet Earth! My last post was a review for the PS2 version of Ratchet & Clank: Size Matters, the second-latest game in the series. After completing and reviewing that game, I got started back on the original Ratchet & Clank. Unfortunately, once I got to the super-difficult final boss, I quit, and I don’t think I’ll start back anytime soon. Regardless, I have ended up with its sequel, Ratchet & Clank: Going Commando. How?

Well, my sister has had a birthday, and it is family tradition to give the birthday boy/girl a crap-load of money. My sister, who has, for whatever reason, gotten into Ratchet & Clank, has bought Going Commando, Up Your Arsenal, and Deadlocked off eBay (the former of which is not coming until July because the person who put it on eBay is currently on vacation). So, this is how I’ve ended up with it. Although it’s my sister’s present, I play it about ten times more than her, so it’s basically my game.

To start things off, the graphics are great. They are a noticeable improvement over the original game’s graphics. There is a higher polygon count, as well as higher resolution. This, among more colors and better textures, allow Going Commando’s graphics to receive the word Great. Though they’re not very great by today’s PS2 standards, they were very good for the time and deserve some credit. The music fits the areas of the game well, despite the fact that it’s forgettable. Thus, the music of the game receives the word Pretty Good.

Ratchet & Clank: Going Commando has a much better, funnier story than the original. During an interview for a TV show about heroes, Ratchet and Clank are beamed into the Bogon Galaxy to solve the crisis of a stolen Megacorp product. The president of Megacorp, Mr. Fizzwidget, hires Ratchet to catch the thief, while Clank is given a special apartment just for him. Ratchet meets the thief, only for the experiment (a Furby-like creature known as the Protopet) to be stolen yet again. The thief enlists the help of a group called Thugs-4-Less to eliminate Ratchet & Clank, although they are thwarted and Ratchet ends up catching the thief and rescuing the Protopet. There’s much more to it, but…why must I spoil it? I will slip in one last little detail, though: Captain Qwark returns in the game, but I will not spoil his role. The story receives the word Awesome! It’s funny, and just gets better and better.

I’ve always noted Ratchet & Clank for its dark, yet silly, humor style, akin to Invader ZIM. For instance, in Ratchet Deadlocked, the announcers made funny, yet foreboding comments about people constantly dying in Dreadzone, and they also kept saying things like, “Ratchet is going to die,” but the nonchalant way they said it was funny (helped by the fact that they were actually rooting against Ratchet, and often accused him of things like taking steroids). I like this kind of humor style a lot, and thus, the game’s humor receives the word Great.

The gameplay for the game mixes elements of third person shooters like Hitman and platformers like Crash Bandicoot. Basically, you have a whole arsenal of weapons, including Ratchet’s trademark Omniwrench, to choose from, and you use them to help you run and jump your way through the areas and break crates full of bolts, the currency of Ratchet & Clank (yes, I know that sounds like Crash Bandicoot). Going Commando was the first game in the series to introduce the weapon upgrade system, although it was improved upon in later games. The Swingshot and Grindboots return, as well as other gadgets, such as the Dynamo and Tractor Beam, which power technology and move certain objects, respectively. Your Nanotech also upgrades frequently, which makes the game a LOT easier. The gameplay receives the word Great.

One huge complaint about the game is that they didn’t improve on the checkpoint system in the first one AT ALL. At the beginning of the game, when you’re probably already used to dying a bunch of times and restarting at the very beginning of the level, you think, “Oh, good, they’ve fixed the checkpoints,” because it’s very easy at the beginning of the game. But towards the end, when things get 20 times harder and you begin to realize that they didn’t really fix them that much. Still, the difficulty has been toned down quite a bit. Here’s a way to prove it: I had hardly any trouble with the last boss at all.

At this point, there is the matter of fun factor. The fun factor is very high. Despite the game’s difficulty level, the learning curve isn’t very long at all if you’ve played the first, making the beginning of the game very easy and fun. It’s still fun towards the end, however, albeit rip-your-hair-out difficult. At least it’s not like in Size Matters where the enemies at the end of the game kill you in one-to-two hits… The fun factor receives the word Awesome!

The replay value for the game is very high. Once the game is completed, you can replay it on Challenge Mode, a harder mode in which you can buy upgrades to your weapons. There are also space battle challenges, a battle arena, hoverbike races, and, as you can expect from Insomniac Games, Skill Points. The replay value gets the word Great.

And in the end, this sequel makes it. It’s more fun than the original, and has added several elements that are mainstays in the series today. Now, to answer the epic question that reviews were created to answer: should you buy this game? Of course!

Final Word: Awesome! It’s better than its predecessor in many areas, but the checkpoints should have been worked on a bit more…

Returning to Ratchet

noreply@blogger.com (T-Man) — Sat, 14 Jun 2008 03:57:00 +0000

So, yes, Ratchet & Clank. The series is well known among Sony gamers, and is one of Sony’s mascots alongside the Jak series, and, in some areas, Sly Cooper. Yet, out of these three series, the only one I have ever truly played hardcore is Sly Cooper. Don’t get me wrong, I HAVE both the original Jak and Ratchet games, but I’ve never really played them that much, outside of a few spells now and then.

To say that fills me with guilt, considering those series’ first games have been released seven and six years ago, respectively, and I have had them since I was at least six years old. Yep, I’m 12, still haven’t beaten either one. I even ended up with Jak 2 somehow and still have hardly played the original Jak and Daxter.

Of course, being a fan of action games, I have always liked Ratchet & Clank better, and thus, played it more often. I got started back on it recently, too. The problem? I thought my game was scratched because it kept freezing, although it turned out that it was just dirty. Until I figured that out, to fill the void, I played Ratchet & Clank: Size Matter. Having bought it during my trip to Myrtle Beach, I resolved that I would complete the original first, until…well, you know what happened. So, I just gave up and decided to play Size Matters.

Now, not having a PSP, I ended up buying the PS2 version. While graphics aren’t exactly a main point of a game, I have to say that the graphics for the PS2 version are kind of dated. While this is forgivable, due to the above reason, with graphical masterpieces such as the new Resident Evil and God of War titles for PS2, a graphical tune-up wouldn’t have hurt. Some of the sound effects and music aren’t up-to-date, either, but it won’t bother most gamers (unless you’re really picky about graphics and sound).

The gameplay is essentially the same as the past Ratchet games (minus Deadlocked). Basically, it’s a shooter-platformer. You have several weapons to use. From the beginning you already have the Lacerator, the Acid Bomb Glove, and the Hypershot. The Lacerator is a good projectile weapon for the beginning of the game, but toward the end, even when it levels up, it is fairly weak. As for the Acid Bomb Glove, I’ve never cared for the gloves in the Ratchet games anyway. The Hypershot is basically the Swingshot with a laser cord instead of a metal one. There are also several weapons that you can buy later in the game, although most of them (with a few lone exceptions, such as the Shock Rocket) aren’t that great. There are also special things, such as the Sprout-O-Matic, which allows you to water plants (you’ll know what the point is if you play the game), a barrier item, the Polarizer (a magnet that allows you to activate certain things), and the Shrink Ray. The Shrink Ray can’t be used as a normal weapon (it would be awesome if it could), but is instead usually used in conjunction with the Grind Boots to enter and break through locks. It has several uses toward the end of the game, however. There are also certain areas where you can play as Clank. He is unbearably weak outside of his giant form, although he has several neat challenges you can play (one of which is required to play).

After the game is beaten, there are several unlockables. You can get the infamous Skill Points so that you can activate cheats, and the Challenge Mode you unlock after completing the game will keep you occupied for quite some time. There are also several races and Clank Challenges (as mentioned earlier). The races, however, are somewhat frustrating, although they can be fun, especially with the new flying mechanic. There are also Titanium Bolts and armor (which you can actually wear, and its effects add to your ratchet-axe as well as protect you from damage) to collect.

Now, this game is REALLY difficult. I’m not saying that because I stink at Ratchet & Clank, because I don’t (you should have seen me blast through Exterminator Mode on Ratchet Deadlocked with the Mega Dual Vipers). I’m being serious! Even with your weapons at their highest levels, the most health you can get, and armor covering your whole body, most enemies toward the end of the game will kill you in about two hits. The last boss, in fact, kills you in only one hit! Really, the only thing that got me through the game was the Shock Rocket; it’s the only projectile weapon in the game aside from the pretty weak Lacerator.

Before I conclude the review, the story must be evaluated. So, basically while Ratchet & Clank are helping a little girl with her school project on heroes, she is abducted because she has a Technomite artifact. The Technomites had made several inventions, although they were never given any credit for it, and they have, thus, launched an attack on galactic civilization. Behind the scenes, Captain Qwark is looking for his family… Several twists pop up now and then, however, and the story gets increasingly interesting.

So, that’s it. If you want my advice, buy the PSP version (if you have a PSP); it’s probably cheaper since it’s been on the market for longer. If you don't, though, the PS2 version is still worth it, especially if you're like me and don't think that a Ratchet game would be as good on PSP. Anyway…

Graphics and Sound: Mediocre. Being a port of a PSP game, they’re a good bit dated, especially compared to the graphical masterpieces the PS2 has been seeing lately.
Gameplay: Good. It’s pretty much the same as the original game, but there are certain flaws. The weapons are mostly mediocre, which is a minus, and the game is rip-your-hair-out difficult toward the end of the game.
Fun Factor: Great! Despite its bad points, the game is very fun. Not as fun as the original, but still very fun.
Glitches: Good. There are a few glitches here and there, but the only one that sticks out is that music in boss fights sometimes doesn’t play unless you pause and unpause.
Replay Value: Awesome! The Challenge Mode is where most of it comes from, as well as collecting armor, Titanium Bolts, and, of course, the infamous Skill Points!
Story: Awesome! It’s funny, and gets more and more interesting as you play.
Length: Good. I beat it pretty quickly, but I played hardcore, so…
Overall: Great! A few flaws bog it down, but, in general, it’s Ratchet & Clank goodness.
Buy It or Skip It? Buy it.